It is a Friday night. The girls have the next week off, it’s Zoe’s birthday weekend, and we had big plans of eating pizza and watching “Don’t Tell Mom the Babysitter’s Dead.” It is a classic, after all.

So after school, I was sipping a glass of wine while Zak and the girls were playing a game of Exploding Kittens. I randomly scratched my side back and felt something different. At first, I thought it was a skin tag or something. I don’t even know what that is except that you get them when you get older and I’m starting to get a lot more grey hair and wrinkles, so I figured that it was my time for skin tags too. I pulled a bit and was surprised that with some effort it separated from my skin. I looked at it was shocked to see a bug. I freaking bug. That had been on me! I told Zak that I thought I just detached a tick from me. He didn’t think that could be the case, but upon further inspection of it, we determined that it was in fact a tick.

A few things should be noted now:
1. I HATE bugs.
2. We went camping a week ago. Simple mathematics indicates that freaking bug was on me for a week. Eww!!
3. I have watched every episode Real Housewives of Beverly Hills and know Lyme disease ruined Yolanda’s life.
4. I have also read the Daily Mail articles about Arvil Lavigne’s experience with Lyme. Not good.

So, put all that together, and I did what any person would do: demand that the whole household get naked. We searched and quickly determined that I was the only victim. Zak told me I should go to the doctor, but they were already closed, so I decided to wait until the morning to head in. Then I started googling. Bad idea.

I emailed the principal at our school. Most folks probably wouldn’t email their boss within moments of making such a discovery, but he is an avid camper (think Eagle Scout) and has given us camping/hiking advice. He asked questions which led to more googling and tears.

I am now waiting in an hour plus line at the Minute Clinic, planning on getting some antibiotics started. I’m hoping my journey though Lyme disease will be short and painless. Updates to come.

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